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 1972
January
No 105
Being Perfectly Frank
By Steve Turner, 3 pp
Frank Zappa was staying at the London hotel which possesses the actual loo shown
on his internationally famous poster. When I arrived at the reception area I
phoned his room: "George Harrison and Friends Mortuary House", came the quick
reply which at least assured me that I'd dialed the right number. It was some
unscripted humour from Mark Volman and after a quick word with Frank he invited
me up to the second floor.
I knocked on the door which had the number I was given and the next door down
was opened by Volman. In side Frank was busy relating his next movie to a
visiting journalist. For about fifteen minutes he spun tales of such likely
heroes as Billy the Mountain, Howie Krishna, The Magic Pig, Old Zircon and
Studebaker Hawk before ending with a warning not to mention a word of it in the
article because it was an unfinished project! The other scribe packed his papers
and made his exit while I took a seat, my head full of warnings given to me by
people who'd seen Frank on The Old Grey Whistle Test the night before where he
condemned music writers as being people who were only in it for the albums.
Frank checked himself in the mirror before giving his blessing to the
photographer. "Yeah. That's me all right," he said with a rare laugh. He began
by telling me that he couldn't really remember what he'd said on the TV show the
night before because it was made following a meal during which vast quantities
of wine were served. He qualified the statement though by saying that he knew it
was at least true in the States on the admission of writers he'd encountered. He
wasn't concerned only for the Mothers either – it was the whole music scene that
he was considering. (read
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